As I mentioned in a previous post, I will be sharing other people’s testimonies under Grace in Action. Others’ testimonies should serve to encourage us and glorify God by seeing His grace in their lives.
I am so excited to introduce my fellow blogger, also named Amanda, who has offered to share her testimony, so without further delay, here’s Amanda’s testimony:
Disappointment with God
I’m so excited to be able to write this post on Amanda’s blog because I started my own blog recently, but decided that while I’m a Christian and a writer that doesn’t necessarily mean I have to be a “Christian writer”. While I’ll always have those lenses on in the way I view the world and interact with it, sometimes you have to let go of trying to write about everything, for the sake of targeting and creating a really good blog. If you’re curious, I even have a recent post on it and you can check it out at Reluctant “Christian”.
So I guess this is the beauty of getting to do guest posts! 🙂 And today, Amanda has asked me to share my testimony, so here goes!
The way I’d say I’ve always experienced God in my life is through my feelings and emotions. I’d feel God lead me through my emotions or I would get excited about God during worship or at church or in my daily life. But what happens when those feelings and emotions aren’t there anymore?
I grew up going to church, and even though I didn’t always go to church, I ended up following a leading I felt to go back to church in my early 20’s during a confusing period of time in my life. I got baptized a few years later and then a couple years after that I ended up going to a different church after experiencing the loss of a relationship.
Even in those early years I experienced a great excitement with discovering a relationship with God and growing in that relationship by building relationships with people in the body. And perhaps you need that feeling of motivation and excitement in the early years.
But then the truth is, those feelings and emotions don’t always last forever. And besides, we know we don’t always have the option to do things in life when we feel like it, like writing every day or going to work, or reading your bible, persevering in faith, or doing what’s right.
When I started going to a new church, I felt another wave of excitement, feelings and emotions as I learned new things about God and experienced his healing power in my life helping me overcome years of depression. But again, those feelings came up and came down again.
In the past season, I’ve also experienced disappointment with God, disappointment with not being where I expected to be in my career, relationships, or even spiritually. But out of that what I’m learning is to press into these times with God even more deeply.
As I recognized that I had been harbouring disappointment with God and started to move out of that, new emotions started to return and stir in me. But this time I asked God, no, don’t return those emotions to me, just yet. I want to learn to seek you, to know you more, to persevere in you because it’s not about the emotions.
Again, I love to feel those emotions, and I think that’s one of the ways that I’ve always felt led by God and communicated with Him. But I feel like, for a season, maybe God was asking me, is it OK if I turn off this primary way that you experience being with me so I can grow you up and grow you stronger in some other ways? So realizing that, my answer is wholeheartedly yes.
I blog at https://amandayvonne.wordpress.com/ where I write about navigating life, blogging for a living, and finding your voice. If you’d like to get in touch with me, feel free to leave me a comment there. I’d love to hear from you!
Rahab2: I hope you felt inspired by Amanda’s testimony and I encourage you to check out her blog to hear more about her journey. If you’re interested in sharing your story, please leave a comment below or email me at email@example.com.